Mixed orientation marriage

It only takes a spark – how conversion therapy ended in Australia

By |2025-12-02T17:22:44+11:00December 2nd, 2025|Categories: Conversion therapy, Freedom2b, LGBTQ Rights|Tags: , |

The Small Beginnings that Transformed the Landscape of LGBTQ+ Religious Harm in Australia The pivotal role of the Exex-gay group, Freedom2b, and Ambassadors & Bridge Builders International (ABBI) For decades, LGBTQ+ people of faith suffered in silence. Behind church doors and in confidential pastoral sessions, thousands were told their sexuality or gender identity was [...]

A Life of Unlearning more relevant now than ever

By |2019-09-24T15:42:22+10:00September 19th, 2019|Categories: A Life of Unlearning|Tags: , , |

Fifteen years ago, in 2004, 'A Life of Unlearning - coming out of the church, one man's struggle' hit Australian book and department store shelves. I had no idea that: It would become an Australian bestseller and sell out twice There'd be two more revised and updated editions It would change the lives of literally 1,000s [...]

I’m gay in a straight marriage – what about me and my partner

By |2020-10-21T11:02:16+11:00October 25th, 2014|Categories: LGBTQ, LGBTQ Therapy|Tags: |

Introduction A mixed orientation marriage (MOM) is where one partner is heterosexual and the other is same-sex-oriented (gay or lesbian) or bi-sexual. The situation we find ourselves in is not usually one of intentional deception. (In some cultures, families and geographical areas this may be different however, as it is a matter of survival). For [...]

When a married straight man falls in love with another man

By |2025-08-08T17:39:38+10:00April 30th, 2013|Categories: General, LGBTQ, Mixed Orientation Marriage|Tags: , |

When a married 'straight' man falls in love with another man Thanks for your email Anthony, and for reaching out to me like this. It is wonderful to finally have someone to talk to. Some who actually understands my situation. In your email you said, ‘I guess the question arises Joe - what happens [...]

What is closet hokey pokey?

By |2019-04-26T11:30:33+10:00April 25th, 2013|Categories: Gay Christian, LGBTQ, Mixed Orientation Marriage|Tags: , |

They're out. They're in. They're out. They're in. They're out. They're in.  They are playing closet hokey pokey. Closet hokey pokey’ is a phenomena I have observed working with gay men and lesbians from faith backgrounds for many years now. Closet hokey pokey doesn't occur as frequently amongst those from non-faith backgrounds. If you come [...]

Can a straight person become gay?

By |2022-12-17T16:25:41+11:00December 6th, 2012|Categories: General|Tags: , , , |

Can a straight person become gay? Yes it happened twice: once in Wales and now in France We often hear uneducated and ill-informed religious people sprouting the theory straight people can be turned gay. And that’s why they tell us it’s best to keep homosexuals in the closet, out of our schools and  that diversity/anti-bullying [...]

Ex-gay = contradictions, denial and mental gymnastics

By |2025-03-19T13:08:26+11:00November 3rd, 2012|Categories: Conversion therapy|Tags: , , , , |

When people say they are struggling with unwanted-same-sex attraction and seek to be "ex-gay", their minds play all manner of crazy tricks on them in order to keep the hope alive. Insidious denial, contradictions and mental gymnastics are the only way they can maintain the "ex-gay" facade. It's a sad and tragic reality to live [...]

Reaching out to an Australian ‘ex-gay’ leader – Liberty Christian Ministries

By |2019-05-05T23:37:38+10:00May 5th, 2012|Categories: Conversion therapy|Tags: , , , , , , |

After the recent mainstream media reports on ex-gay ministries in Australia and also the impact of The Cure documentary, I felt it was time to reach out once again to a person from ex-gay camp suggesting that we might meet up and engage in dialogue. My email was passed  on to the Director of the ministry. Below is [...]

Gay Religious Suicide – why we will never be able to count the cost

By |2017-04-29T13:27:41+10:00April 10th, 2012|Categories: Church, Gay Christian, LGBTQ|Tags: , , , |

Recent research demonstrates something I have been pointing out for some time now. That is, that LGBT people of faith and religion experience the usual issues of resolving their sexuality or gender identity, coming out, finding their place in the community and learning what it means to live authentically in a predominately straight world.  They often however, experience [...]

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