Another Milestone in the 25-Year Journey

Milestone (definition) a significant stage or event in the development of something.

Contents:

• Milestone 1 – From Shame to Solidarity: Launching a Support Network for Ex-Ex-Gays in Australia
• Milestone 2 – Revealing the Hidden Story: A Life of Unlearning and Its Impact on Australia's Ex-Gay Movement
• Milestone 3 – Taking Action: The Fight to Shut Down Conversion "therapy" in Australia
• Milestone 4 – Tackling the root of the problem through legislation
• Milestone 5 – Anti-Discrimination NSW launches website on LGBTQA conversion practices.
• Interested in Learning More? –Does your church leadership, denomination, or LGBTQ organisation need training in conversion "therapy" and practices?

On August 10, 2000, I did something I had never done before. The internet was becoming a bigger part of my life, and I had begun to explore spaces like online Yahoo forums, including a couple dedicated to ex-ex-gays in the United States. The term "ex-ex-gay" was coined by those who had survived conversion "therapy", or the ex-gay movement as it was commonly known then.

Until that moment, I had never spoken about my own traumatic experience. Back in 1972, I admitted myself to a residential Christian community that believed they could "convert" me from my homosexuality to heterosexuality. Like many others who had gone through similar programs, I carried a deep sense of shame—not about the failure of the process, but about the fact that I had entrusted others with the power to "fix" something I believed to be abnormal, and evil within me.

Milestone 1

From Shame to Solidarity: Launching a Support Network for Ex-Ex-Gays in Australia

In 1999, everything changed. An internal shift happened within me: condemnation gave way to reconciliation, internalised homophobia transformed into acceptance and self-love, and shame replaced by pride.

Through the U.S.-based Yahoo groups, I discovered a community of survivors—some who had found healing and were now advocates for change, and others still suffering from the scars left by years of trying to become someone they weren't. Most of the conversations centred on Exodus International, which had been founded in 1976 and was the umbrella organisation for nearly 100 affiliated ministries at that time.

Exodus International South Pacific had seven ministries across Australia and New Zealand, yet I noticed something unsettling: there were no Australian survivors in these U.S. Yahoo groups. Surely, if these programs were so active in Australia, there had to be others who had experienced the same pain and devastation.

On August 10, 2000, I decided to act. I created Exex-gay—a space specifically designed to connect and support survivors within Australia. The group quickly grew, eventually reaching nearly 400 members, with a monthly volume of over 400 individual messages exchanged. It was a community I never imagined would exist.

Milestone 2

Revealing the Hidden Story: A Life of Unlearning and Its Impact on Australia's Ex-Gay Movement

In 2004, the first edition of my autobiography, A Life of Unlearning was published. The book became a bestseller and sold out twice. It was the first—and, for many years, the only—conversion "therapy" survivor story told in Australia. My background as a well-known, popular Pentecostal preacher undoubtedly helped the book gain attention. For the first time, those who had known me as a preacher (and heard the rumours and gossip) could now read the full story, the parts I had hidden for so long.

As a married preacher, I had been a closet "ex-gay." Others, like Sy Rogers, had built ministries around their "I'm no longer gay" stories and became famous preachers, but I kept my struggles to myself, knowing it would be hypocritical to say "I am now completely straight". But now, my warts and all story was public, and it resonated deeply with many LGBTQ readers, as well as their families and friends who knew of the trauma they'd been through. Many reached out to me with emails that began, "Your story is my story." I was stunned. Where had all these people been?

At this point, the number of "change is possible" ministries had exploded. Australia and New Zealand, with their relatively small populations, were home to more of these organisations per capita than the United States. There were nearly 40 active ministries spread across the two countries.

Some of the largest included Liberty Christian Ministries (backed by the Sydney Anglican Diocese), Living Waters (with branches in Sydney, Melbourne, and Canberra), Exodus in Melbourne, Roundabout Ministries (led by Adrian Rowse), Liberty Inc in Brisbane, and Beyond Egypt in Sydney. Also, Christian therapists were only too happy to help troubled gay and lesbian believers come to a place of "healing and wholeness" = heterosexuality. The Catholic Church also ran Courage groups, which were promoted by the infamous Cardinal George Pell. Courage's stated goal was "To live chaste lives in accordance with the Roman Catholic Church's teaching on homosexuality (Chastity)" though some survivors reported stories that went far beyond celibacy. In churches where homosexuality was believed and preached that it was a sickness, an abomination and unnatural, people were desperate to become "normal", get married, and have a family. It was the only option.

Not only were there organisations operating in Australia, but there were also many online ministries that operated in the U.S. that were being accessed by troubled LGBTQ people in Australia churches. Sometimes with devastating results.

Milestone 3

Taking Action: The Fight to Shut Down Conversion "therapy" in Australia

After hearing thousands of heart-wrenching stories, I knew I couldn't sit idly by. I had a privileged position as my inbox and become a microscope into a hidden world of individuals who needed empathy, support, and healing. The devastation was undeniable and consistent in so many emails—rejection by families and friends, mental health struggles, failed marriages, and suicide attempts. I couldn't ignore it any longer.

I set a goal: to see every "ex-gay" organisation in Australia shut down. Every claim made by these groups needed to be challenged, and the harmful myth of "sexual reorientation" had to be deconstructed.

But a goal without a strategy is just a dream.

I developed a clear, focused strategy:

1. Raise awareness across the LGBTQ+ and broader community by sharing my story on as many outlets as possible, including both gay and mainstream media.
2. Encourage survivors of conversion "therapy" to tell their stories.
3. Challenge former leaders (often victims as much as the survivors) of the movement to speak out.
4. Create online spaces where people could access honest and realistic information about "pray the gay away" and its harms.
5. Write articles that would help closeted individuals in churches find truthful answers and guidance.
6. Promote research that could expose the harm and ineffectiveness of conversion "therapy".

By mid-2012, two-thirds of LGBTQ+ conversion "therapy" organisations in Australia had shut their doors. Not long after, Living Waters and Beyond Egypt followed suit. Exodus itself closed down in 2013.

But that wasn't the end. It was only the beginning.

Milestone 4

Tackling the root of the problem through legislation

I understood where the real battle lay. Closing down the groups was just the 'low-hanging fruit' in my view. The larger, more challenging fight was tackling the deeply ingrained beliefs within the minds of conservative, fundamentalist Christians, and confronting the hetero normativity that was championed in churches and taught in their educational institutions.

As I noted during a presentation at a 2009 conference in Florida.:

"My belief is that ex-gay ministries are often not the cause but are more like the symptom of a much bigger problem. The real enemy is ignorance. That is, the ignorance that exists in Christian circles about sexual orientation. When the director of Exodus, Alan Chambers, claims that Exodus gets over 400,000 calls and emails annually from people saying they hate being homosexual, we have to ask the questions 'Is Exodus the cause or only responding to something far deeper?'. Did these peoples' journey begin because of Exodus, or just where these tortured people end up? Exodus offers hope for the 'problem' in subtly disguised messages of 'change'. Ninety-nine percent of these inquiries come from evangelicals and Pentecostals."

Changing deeply held fundamentalist beliefs would be a task that would take decades or even centuries.

The harm caused by anti-LGBTQ beliefs and conversion practices has been well-documented in research since 1991. Survivors have courageously shared their harrowing stories to media outlets, while films like Boy Erased and documentaries, like The Cure, have played a crucial role in raising awareness. LGBTQ rights advocates, organisations, and mental health professionals have increasingly joined the fight for a change of what academic Christine Robinson called a Genocide.

Then, the introduction of bans began. The first was California in 2012, followed by several other states across the U.S. Some bans targeted only minors, while others focused on licensed therapists only. Although these laws had their limitations and were criticised for missing where much of the harm occurred, they marked an important starting point. The momentum continued to build, leading to bans being implemented in various European countries, South America, Canada, and New Zealand. In Australia, Queensland became the first state to ban LGBTQ conversion practices in 2020, followed by Victoria the next year and the Australian Capital Territory in 2021.

Last year, New South Wales, passed the Conversion Practices Ban Act 2024, which included  a balanced but comprehensive approach to the situation. The legislation was to be implemented  in April the following year, which brings me to the big milestone. Number 5.

Milestone 5

Anti-Discrimination NSW launches website on LGBTQA conversion practices.

On the 3^rd April, at the NSW Parliament House, Anti-Discrimination NSW (ADNSW) launched its civil complaints scheme and website on LGBTQA Conversion Practices. I had the honour and privilege of being the first speaker at the event (speech here).

Some landmark guidelines have been introduced.

• The individual themselves can make a complaint or someone on their behalf.
• Both the practices and the exemptions are clearly defined.
• A formal complaint can lead to conciliation between the people involved, targeted education, or further investigation. Individuals who make a formal complaint are not required to meet with the other party, unless they choose to.
• Anyone who provides a conversion practice that causes substantial mental or physical harm, or endangers an individual's life, can face up to 5 years in prison.
• Taking someone outside of NSW for these practices – or engaging someone from outside of NSW to deliver a conversion practice to someone in NSW – can lead to up to 3 years in prison, a fine, or both.
• If a matter does not resolve through conciliation, it might go on to the NSW Civil and Administrative Tribunal, where the outcome could include financial compensation up to $100,000.
• Seventeen questions are listed in the FAQ's and the pages are translated into six different languages.

As I said in my speech at the launch:

"Some will argue that the legislation infringes on religious freedoms or parental rights. But it's not anti-religion. This is about ending the well-documented harm and protecting vulnerable LGBTQA people."

"A new law won't instantly change minds. We still have much work to do to overcome ignorance and misinformation. As I always say,

"Religious organisations and individuals aren't the enemy. The real enemy is ignorance. Change comes from focusing our energies transforming the latter instead of attacking the former."

"The program launched today by the NSW government is a step in the right direction. It will help create a safer environment where LGBTQA people and families can thrive, and most importantly, it WILL save lives."

Interested in Learning More?

Does your church leadership, denomination, or LGBTQ organisation need training in conversion "therapy" and practices?

As part of our commitment to education and advocacy, we've developed a training package that explores the complexities and consequences of conversion practices in depth. Here's what it covers:

• The History of the "Change is Possible" Movement
  Understanding the origins and evolution of the movement advocating for sexual orientation and gender identity change efforts.
• What is Conversion "Therapy"?
  Identifying the various forms LGBTQ conversion practices can take, from informal interventions to organised programs.
• Key Terminology and Language Shifts
  Exploring how and why language around LGBTQ conversion practices has changed, and the importance of respectful, accurate terminology.
• Legal Framework and Boundaries
  A clear overview of current legislation: what is permitted, what is prohibited, and how the law protects individuals.
• Survivor Voices
  Personal testimonies from those who have experienced LGBTQ  conversion practices—highlighting impact.
• Why These Practices Are Harmful—and Now Illegal
  Examining the psychological, emotional, and social harm caused by LGBTQ conversion practices, and the evidence that led to their prohibition.
• Further Resources
  Guidance on where to go for more information and support.

Contact us now for more information. info@abbi.org.au

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