A Life of Unlearning is now in its third edition. Who would have thought, now 18 years since it was first published in 2004, that it would still be selling and impacting lives?
This Facebook message received recently is one of the many showing how profoundly people are often impacted.
“Thank you for writing #alifeofunlearning”. It took me less than 48 hours to cry my way through it. It could have been my autobiography…. Up until the point where you were forced ‘out’.
I totally broke down when you wrote about thinking about driving off the highway to end it all – that is exactly what happened to me just last year.
I have spoken to a few close friends (2 gay one not) about coming out. Two are wonderfully supportive, but bizarrely, one of the gay ones is telling me not to because of the pain it will cause my wife. So the next stage is to talk to my wife and my denomination. I have written out what i am going to say and I’m thinking about when to do it. Probably after Christmas.
All of that is not the point of this pm – the point is that while you hit a raw nerve in me and unleashed deep emotions I’ve been burying, you also gave me hope. You made me feel that there were others out there and i am not alone. Probably even more importantly though is that i can take these next steps knowing it doesn’t have to be all bad. At times i’ve felt that i was going to walk into darkness. Strange, as I’ve been living in darkness way too long.
For your book, I cannot thank you enough.”
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